Exercise in, Flash Fiction, Just for fun, Style, Under 500

A Student Talks to an English Major

“Dude, holy crap!”

“What? Everything alright?”

“I just saw that new RDJ movie! It was incredible!”

“Yeah, he’s always on point with his acting. And Robert Duvall? Forget about it. What more could you demand in a film?”

“I knoooooow! The feels!”


“There were so many points where I just felt like crying… It was awk.”


“And somebody had a laser pointer, I guess for the lulz.”


“OMG! I’ll BRB! GTG get summa dat BBQ.”

“… Friendshp over.”

Exercise in, Style, Under 500

Why Bother?

Okay, y’all. I’m going to call this “Why Bother?” It’s an “initiative” I guess… the idea here is that I get exhausted by the plethora of people who question my every action, decision, ideal, moral, or whatever else they don’t understand. So, I’m just writing a blurb about why I bother with something people ask about. 95% of my facebook friends won’t see this but, it doesn’t matter. I’m doing it anyway because this is the internet and YOU CAN’T STOP ME! MUAHAHAHAHA!

Now, on the facebook version, I tagged a bunch of people… taking for granted that everyone on WordPress is a writer to some degree, this is a call to action for all of you. If you read this, please like and/or comment to let me know if you will be writing about something you’re driven towards. I’d like to make sure I read those!


Without further ado…


I don’t need a flat stomach; I need a strong core.
I don’t need to be big; I need to be powerful.
I don’t need to win the fight; I need to end the conflict.
I don’t need to change others, I need to change myself
I don’t need perfection; I need progress.

I practice Aikido because before I ever studied it, it had been established along the path I sought. I practice Aikido because it’s impossible for me to do without finding a way to improve. I practice Aikido because the art takes problems and creates solutions. The Aiki mind is never stumped, for there is always another way. The Aiki spirit is never trumped, as there is always progress to be made. The Aiki practitioner can only be defeated by the self and that is the central struggle we all face. Aikido leads the person you are to the person you will become and, if you are mindful, that person will become exactly who you intended.

flash fiction, Style, Under 500

Next time, just call 911 or something

I go to the local library and check out a few books. At first, I wasn’t sure I’d seen them. But on second glance, I realized the black shelf contained only a handful of old, leather-bound books. I picked one up and skipped in a few pages. I’d hardly ever seen this runic language in my lifetime.

Carrying the book, time seems to fly past. Yet upon arriving home, minutes become hours. Reading the material increases the velocity of my thoughts and my lucidity. Eventually, I reach the conclusion that the runes are not only extinct, but ciphered. Hours poured into the analysis of a single page. In the end, only one end can be reached. The book describes a gesture and an incantation. Performing the ritual, I open a window in space.

The experience blows me away. I watch businessmen sing karaoke in a Tokyo bar, then African tribes at war. Next, the window takes me to Europe, where a radical IRA cell plans an attack on a British-owned hospital. In that moment, the power at my disposal becomes apparent. I must stop anyone who would so callously take innocent lives in the masque of a political cause.

As I read further through the book, I learn of a way to reach through this window. With another spell, it becomes a door a door. The soldiers see me and immediately pointed their guns. The apparent fusion of two points in space disorients them as much as it does me. One thinks to throw a grenade. I close the door and open the window just in time to watch the grenade land in their house and explode.

I’ve never seen men lose limbs, burn in agony… their house must have been an explosives cache, as the thing practically disintegrated and not one man was left a complete body. I close the window before it is made clear if any survived. The image will haunt me forever. I know now the dangers of the power at my disposal, and why a wizard should never utilize his magic before trying a mundane solution to his problems.

Exercise in, Flash Fiction, Style, Under 500

Untitled exercise in style

As always, there must be at least one new piece constructed daily. Here’s this. After reading through it, I think my next challenge will be to write a piece that only uses words of 4 or more letters.

Though style and flavor and sounding like a pretentious academic were the goal of this exercise, there is also the underlying reality. You can’t let society be content – not because we can always do better, but because we can always do worse. Evolution is forward, not upward. We can push ourselves into extinction and we have already out-lasted most species’ time on this Earth. IMHO, we are not collectively intellectual enough to beat our own extinction.

I doubt anyone is here to read about my views on the self-destructive nature of the human race. Instead, read this. If you think to yourself “Pretentious, self-righteous garbage,” then I succeeded in my exercise. If you think to yourself “Good point,” then I succeeded in… point-making.

The fraternal design of academic society consistently deters me from maximal potential. Beneath the facade of education lay the purest essence of self-destruction.

Social competition leads these imbecilic sheep to forget that a university is meant as a place of study, to achieve unrivalled mastery in a field of production. Society creates nothing but petty oppositional conflict for no better reason, no higher purpose.

Do you not see the strain your unwillingness to look past your need to belong creates? Can you not see that getting through school is not the same as succeeding? That passing a course does not equate to learning its curriculum?

When social interaction dictates success, true knowledge becomes a burden and the few who seek it bear the immense weight of our entire species on feeble shoulders. Has history taught you nothing? Did you not realize Atlas would fall?